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Tuesday, November 04th, 2008 | Author:

I am no longer the proud owner of a Nikon D80 camera. It was my pride and joy for a good eleven months, but now, almost certainly, will have been sold on for a fraction of its worth by the local scrotes from Huyton, the once-nice, little village where I grew up. Along with the other items that they stole when they broke into my mum’s house this weekend. My iPod, cash, clothes, my new hockey stick. You can tell it was probably kids – what possible use might they have for a hockey stick? A trophy? A weapon? If they keep it – they’ll get caught, as this was a very unusual piece of kit.

There was a mini-outrage that such a thing could happen in Warwick Close. I don’t recall a single burglary in thirty years, and that’s saying something for an area that’s been sliding inexorably downhill for the past few years. But times change, and standards have slipped. A new, snider generation, more materialistic and submerged in a drink- and drug-fuelled world of their own, roam the streets of the estates where I grew up. The parents have no control; the offspring have no respect. Robbing from their own – this should not be tolerated. And hopefully it won’t, and those fools will be caught, by fair means or foul. Word is out.

I don’t go home very often, and this has left a very sour taste in my mouth. My mum is shaken that someone could get into her own home so effortlessly, and fears for her own and he granddaughter’s safety, now that she realises just how vulnerable she could be.

“Two Dogs” has gone to the dogs.

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Thursday, January 10th, 2008 | Author:


My Dog

I hate veg. Don’t make me eat it.
I won’t give in till it’s stone cold.
I’ll give that smile: and then it’s hopeless.
You’ll never win an argument with a seven-year-old.

Catch me! Oh, you can’t. Shall I run slower?
Can I keep the change? Ar, go ‘ed, pleeease?
Can I stay out just ten more minutes?
Cos it’s not dark an’ I won’t sleep.
 
Alley, alley-in! No back-answers!
I know where you’ve all hid so where’s the fun in that?
I can see the grown-ups watching
Ready to open the door and shout
If I go anywhere near their garden.

It might be thick as pig-shit but it always brings it back.
Drool flying everywhere it wants another throw.
Eats cats for breakfast but sticks when there’s no cats.
My dog’s the bollocks.

Thursday, November 22nd, 2007 | Author:

The whetstone that hones your senses sharp.
The teacher that tells you once.
The wild horse that is chased
Then ridden, but not broken.

The safety-catch to play with.
The tooth-ache to be probed.
That last mistake, regretted.
That nagging voice, insistant.

Your ego seat-belt.
Your sanity checked.
Your heartbeat’s throttle.
Your life’s respect.

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